I am sorry.

I really want to know whats going on. I dont want things to turn out like that. No one is better. I text people as friend. I dont want you to not care about me anymore. I am really afraid you would fuck me off from your life. I really listen to you. You was still okay with me last night when you came down but afterwards you became a really scary monster. I really want to know why. I will go to school everyday. You said next week is the start for me to prove things to you but next week havent even started yet. Not even in any few hours. I really dont understand. I want to understand. Your harsh words made me scared. Your harsh words made me really really afraid. I dont want to lose this friendship. I know you really care about me. You are angry. Yes i know. You said it is none of my concern. Wow. Harsh. You said i did well in breaking your trust. I wish i did well in keeping the promises. I know i broke my promises a lot. But this time for real i will keep my promise. Maybe it is me whom make you think that you cannot trust me anymore. I am sorry . I am afraid i would screw up my last chance. I am thinking.. what if i really screwed this last chance up. Would we end up being strangers like how we used to be ? Thats not the kind of reality i want. I dont want. I dont want. I dont want. I am really afraid. You are like the monster in every kids closet. Would you come out and kill me. You are scary really scary. I am really scared. You are a monster in my heart now. I want you to become the Mr Angel. Not the Mr Monster. :( i am really really sorrry. Sorry sorry sorry.